Quietmind Recordings

The Quietmind Way


Introduction

We are told that it is normal practice to talk about our problems in order to ‘sort them out’. Indeed as a therapist myself I have always followed this direction, that of needing to ‘talk out’ or release deeply buried emotional traumas and memories. In the past I had enormous success as a professional hypnotherapist and helped to deal with various emotional and even physical problems. Yet I felt something wasn’t quite right, something obvious was being ignored – so obvious that it took me almost 30 years to discover what it was.

I believe in common sense. I believe that anything simple and straightforward always has a place in life. I also believe that all doors can be opened, so long as we have the key.

Maybe the key isn’t what we thought it was. Maybe it isn’t about the key at all, but rising above the door and stepping over it. Maybe it’s really about changing perspectives, seeing things from somewhere else. Maybe it isn’t about talking about all the bad and the painful, but about looking in and finding another sort of truth, a truth that ‘feels’ good, that ‘feels’ right.

I don’t believe any one therapy is the answer to all problems, indeed the reason I developed The Quietmind Way was to help those who have tried and usual therapies and found themselves no better off. So maybe doors do have keys after all, but maybe the journey through that door can take you into the light as opposed to going further into the dark.

The Quietmind Way is not based on complex therapeutic processes, it is based upon individuality, your individuality, you. It is not about finding the pain and the trauma of your past and resurrecting it; it is about moving forward and leaving the past in a place where you no longer have a use for it. To do this you must learn to listen, you must open your heart and ‘feel’ what it says to you.

I do not claim to produce anything other than to take you on a journey of self-discovery, take you to a place of peace and contentment. I do not claim to have the answers, but I do claim to have the questions.

The Quietmind Way is just that, a pathway that takes you quietly into your own mind where you can find that the answers are not about the past, or even the future, but about the now.

Read on, you may just find something that will switch on your light and show you which way to go.

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Part One - The early days

When I first became fascinated with hypnosis and what it did, little did I realise just what a journey I would enter into. In the early days when I was in my mid-teens, all I knew about hypnosis is from what I was able to read, mainly from libraries. Then in my early to late twenties I was able to carry out research into the therapeutic value of using hypnosis as a tool to seek out the underlying causes of emotional and behavioural problems. Over the years I discovered that most of the books I had read only scratched the surface. This spurred me on to delve deeply into the psyche, trying to find the reasons why hypnosis worked the way it did. The one thing I did discover was that there was never one hypnotic technique that suited everyone and the result of using hypnosis differed from person to person. At first I thought it was about the depth of hypnosis reached, but later I found that it was far more subtle than that. There was an underlying factor that was not just preferable to reach and understand, but vital if any solution to the person’s problem was to be successful. In those early days, I knew there was something, but had no idea what it could possibly be.

I started in professional practice as a hypnotherapist in the late seventies, having studied and researched for over 12 years. Although it all started as an interest, it became my life. I remember seeking out second hand bookshops, spending hours searching for anything that would further my knowledge. I could not stand still; the inner mind was something I just had to understand, it was important for me to be able to use it on a much higher level than I had done before. In order to be a successful hypnotherapist I felt I had to become an expert with the main tool of my trade, hypnosis.

For the next 20 plus years I built up a successful practice and slowly began to find myself specialising in depressive illnesses. I felt that the one difficult area of emotional problems that seemed to be most misunderstood was associated with depression. Depression can be extremely complex and yet in some cases, fairly straightforward to help with. I think this is where I began to look at emotional problems from a different angle. For example, usually depression is a result of underlying problems, that is to say, the depression is purely a symptom of something else. So I thought, if this is so with depression, could it also be so with other emotional problems?

It was in the early nineties that I realised my work didn’t feel complete. Even though my success rate was extremely high and my reputation was growing – I had various articles written about my work in newspapers and magazines, I had given several lectures at Cambridge University to the medical faculty and I had appeared on a television programme about alternative medicine – yet it felt as if something was missing. I couldn’t explain what it was, it was a feeling, something deep inside was nagging at me.

I was asked if I would make a series of recordings for sale on cassette tape for a local company. It was whilst in the recording studio that something amazing happened. I had just finished the last recording and wanted to try something a bit different. I sat in the recording booth, closed my eyes and just let go. At first there was nothing but silence, and then gradually I started to speak until I had finished what I had to say. What felt like a couple of minutes was in fact, twenty minutes. It seemed that whilst I was speaking, the recording engineer had problems keeping his eyes open and his assistant went well and truly ‘off’. (That was when I discovered a secret that I now use in all my recordings, which is why the Quietmind recordings are so effective.) I wasn’t in a trance or anything like that, but I was ‘quiet’ in myself – hence Quietmind recordings.

There was still something missing and although my success rate was higher than ever, I was frustrated. The worst of it was, I had no idea why I felt the way I did. I needed direction, I felt an inner need, as if there was something somewhere just out of reach. I knew that I wanted peace and quiet, but as things were in my life there was no way I could achieve this needed calmness, until suddenly in 1997 my whole life changed.

As a result of that change I moved to West Wales and found the peace I was searching for.


After moving to Wales I realised just how much I needed space, I needed time to myself to try to discover what was missing. I needed to develop my own sensitivity, to get more in tune with myself, to find that ‘quietmind’ inside again. I began to meditate and the outcome was unexpected, I was looking for my Quietmind and discovered that I needed to help people again, but not as a hypnotherapist. I couldn’t go back to doing what I used to do, even though I was highly successful, what I felt I had to do was different, a form of counselling that help people to move forward, counselling but not counselling.

The Quietmind Way was beginning to develop, although at the time I had no idea where anything was going. All I knew was that I had to follow what felt right and see where it led. It was then that I discovered a secret, a simple secret, a secret that begins with:

We are all unique, each one of us.

The realisation that the way most therapies work - find the problem and treat it - might not be right for certain people and their problems. Surely just looking into what is wrong with someone is less important than looking at what is right in people. I thought back to when I used to give talks and told people about the importance of self, the importance of who they really were – who they really are.

Then I remembered that it goes back a lot further than that, back to the early days of my research. I had a question which I never really got an answer that completely satisfied me. The question was:

“Why is it that two people can be brought up in the same environment, have the same chances and education and yet turn out different. Indeed two children from the same family, a couple of years apart can be like chalk and cheese, why?”

The simple answer is that one is stronger than the other – but that’s not true, that is saying that weakness brings about problems and strength enables us to go through life without having to suffer.

The answer surely is that they are different people, each an individual, each unique.

So if one is ‘OK’ and the other has a problem, how can looking at their childhood really help, surely it is more about now and the future, not the past. Is this why some people ‘need’ therapy for years and years, because they are sorting out their past and ignoring the productive area in front of them? Surely by constantly delving into past memories and feelings is keeping us ‘in the past’ and not allowing us to move on. What about unhappiness, is this a result of the past rather than the now? Is the past held to blame for all our emotional problems? Are we prisoners of our past and our upbringing? So many questions with so few answers; so is there an answer, a simple answer; is there a way forward without the need to agonise over the pain and emptiness of the past?

Indeed there is.


Part Two - Foundations

Like all therapies, there needs to be a foundation to build on and the Quietmind Way has its foundations too. However, these foundations are not set in concrete, in fact they are not set in anything tangible – let me explain.

As I have already pointed out, most therapies base their processes on problems and problem solving. For example, psychotherapy explores the memories, especially the bad and traumatic ones. When I was a hypnotherapist, I used hypnosis to probe the mind to find these bad feelings and traumas, once found they would be systematically dealt with. However, over the last few years before my move to Wales, I became more and more disillusioned with the whole approach to dealing with people and their problems. Everything seemed to be about looking at the negative and destructive, no emphasis seemed to be placed on the positive and constructive. So I began to introduce a positive element during therapy, by boosting the unconscious through hypnosis. I looked upon it as; if you remove weeds from a garden, replace the weeds with the flowers you wish to grow. The ‘flowers’ I introduced were positive words which meant something special to that particular individual, but usually in the form of congratulations for all the hard work your mind has done etc.. The effect of this seemingly small addition to the therapeutic process was sometimes huge, making the whole therapy process more successful, even at times more enjoyable. In truth, don’t we all (most of us anyway) respond well to praise?

My next objective was to stop using the tool I had always used and been hugely successful with, hypnosis. I discovered during my research that the effects of hypnosis can wear off quickly and clients would need to come back for boosters. At first I thought this problem couldn’t be solved, but with a fresh look into what hypnosis can and cannot do, I managed to find an answer.

One of the biggest problems associated with hypnotherapy is the introduction of ‘False Memory’ and this FMS (False Memory Syndrome) can create more problems than it solves. Even at the lighter end of the emotional scale, problems can be created where there were none. An example would be a direct suggestion telling someone they don’t want to smoke, or that they have become a non-smoker. The client has been smoking for several (many) years and their inner mind has accepted that they are indeed a smoker and along comes this therapist who is telling them that they are not a smoker. From the unconscious mind’s point of view this can become confusing. A simple solution would be to get the unconscious mind to make its own decision about smoking and when it decides that is the way to go, ask (not tell) it to remove the idea of smoking (remove the weeds) and replace it with being a non-smoker (planting the flowers). You can imagine how the inner mind would react if the problem was very deeply buried and didn’t want to be disturbed. You cannot just plant flowers where the thistles grow as the flowers would die and the thistles would end up feeding on the remains of the flowers.

So what approach should I make knowing that each person’s past is their own and should not be compared with anyone else’s past or their problems? This was my dilemma, how to deal with and help people as individuals, but without the need to analyse, regress or discuss past problems over and over, and yet still succeed in helping them to enjoy life?

Firstly I decided that I would use hypnosis, but not as a therapeutic tool, more an aid to creating good feeling and being generally more relaxed and at peace. This was to be an emotional foundation that would gradually develop into an inner confidence that would allow natural emotional growth. So if hypnosis were to be used, how would it be introduced?

‘Quietmind Recordings’ was born.

Before I could develop the Quietmind Way, a foundation had to be laid down, something that will not crumble, something that is based upon the individual’s own needs. One vital element that is generally absent in sufferers of emotional problems immediately came to mind, emotional insecurity. So the recordings (by this time I had chosen to record onto CDs) had to be produced to ensure both deep relaxation and a stability that built an inner feeling of this essential emotional security. Four titles came to mind, Relaxation, Serenity, Quietmind (of course) and Inner Peace, Inner Calm. These would be the foundation builders whilst at the same time, opening the inner mind for the path that leads to the Quietmind Way.

The most positive thing about the Quietmind Recordings is the simple fact that they work on their own. ‘Relaxation’ creates deep relaxation, ‘Quietmind’ creates a quiet mind, ‘Inner Peace, Inner Calm’ creates a feeling of being calm and at peace, and so on. When I record a new CD I always use the secret ingredient I discovered in the recording studio in the early 90’s and from the lovely feedback I receive, I know that special ingredient makes all the difference.


Part Three - The Basics of the Quietmind Way (1)

Although it is not essential to have a Quietmind Recordings CD, it certainly makes the whole process quicker and more thorough. Opening the inner mind and making it more aware, more receptive makes the whole process of the therapy more straightforward, much more enjoyable too.

Unlike most other therapies, the Quietmind Way does not need to go over every aspect of the individual’s past. Old traumas and insecure childhoods do not have to be resurrected and put under any microscope as you will see later.

So what is the Quietmind Way and how does it work?

The Quietmind Way is directly based upon the inner voice we all have, the bit inside that knows all. We refer to it as instinct, a gut feeling or even our inner child. It is based upon the truth of ‘who’ we really are, not the projected personality we have built over the years. The projected personality, I prefer to call it the Projected Image, has been crafted over the years by our heads, by our need to survive. We are brought up to be ‘head’ people, where in truth we are all mostly ‘heart’ people. Some head people prefer it that way and will remain so all their life, they don’t have a problem with being who they are, but this writing is not aimed at people who are happy with their lot. The Quietmind Way is aimed specifically at heart people, people who feel they don’t quite fit in, people who suffer with aspects of depression, anxiety, guilt, emotional turmoil and general feelings of a lack of self-worth.

So what are ‘head’ people and ‘heart’ people?

Head people are people who live their lives through their thought processes. They tend to think about everything and base their decisions upon logic as much as anything else. Heart people go with their feelings and are often led by what they call gut instinct. The head holds all the logic, but logic based upon their own personal experiences as well as knowledge they have gathered during their lifetime. This logic can be very black and white, leaving no space for doubt. For business this can be a huge asset, equally it can be too rigid and too cut and dry. (The strangest thing is that head people are more likely to have (physical) heart problems!)

Heart people go with flow. They make their decisions on the spur of the moment, going with what feels right at the time. They don’t question what they feel, not at the time anyway. They just glide along. The biggest problem that arises from this way of life tends to be guilt, guilt created by others who cannot understand the ‘heart’ way, which sadly seems to be the vast majority.

Head peoples’ problems are associated with what remains in the head. Stress, anxiety, frustration, anger and guilt to name but a few, all negative, all if repressed or kept alive by worry (or self-analysis) can become extremely harmful (both physically and emotionally). One good reason why I believe it is unnecessary to keep going over past problems in order to ‘resolve’ them, is that all the negative thoughts and feelings are being constantly stirred up and analysed. Surely, it is important to ‘move on’ rather than try to regress into the past to sort out problems of a time when we were not who we are today.

It took me 30 years to realise that regression therapy, although extremely powerful, was not the only answer. In all those years I personally regressed several thousand people who all benefitted to some degree from their ‘journeys’, this I did as a matter of normal practice, so I never questioned whether the process was necessary or not. When I finally did question it all, I discovered the first basic element of the Quietmind Way, the importance to feel. The whole purpose of living is to grow, to move forward and I felt that I was, to a degree, hindering that process by ‘returning to the scene of the crime’ as it were. To feel from within as opposed to feeling from the head, gives a totally different perspective on life, indeed by removing the ‘feeling process’ from the head removes all doubt.

No-one is totally head or heart, some might disagree, but we are designed to be living, thinking, feeling and knowing beings; we are not designed to hold on to stress, worry or guilt and yet most of us seemingly do. We know worry is generally pointless and yet we worry. We know that guilt is normally a result of a decision that, in hindsight/time/experience is something we might not have made, and yet we still do it. We know that a stressful life can lead to severe physical and emotional problems, and yet…

So what is the answer indeed is there an answer?

Some years ago a man came to see me who was under considerable pressure with both his job and his health. He had recently had a heart attack, his second and was told he needed to rest. He came to see me to help him to relax so he would be able to get back to work. After almost an hour of talking I asked him a question, “Do you want to live or die?” This really hit the mark and his reaction was to get angry.

“I want you to relax me so I can get back to work; why on earth did you ask such a stupid question?”

“Because”, I said, “I am not willing to waste my time on someone who is heading for the cemetery.”

He got up to leave and I just sat back in my chair and waited. As he reached the door he turned, looked at me and returned to the chair. He was holding his chest and his breathing laboured.

He looked at me and said, “You bastard.”

I smiled, “Agreed,” I said, “but I think you realise why I asked the question now.”

I told him if he wanted to ‘live’ he needed to completely change his lifestyle, permanently. He was not keen on this approach and told me so. I repeated what I had said and explained that at the present time his lifestyle (working up to 16 hours a day 7 days a week) was killing him. If, once he recovered from his second heart attack he went back into that lifestyle, his next heart attack would be fatal. I explained that his body had told him to slow down, but he constantly ignored all the signs and so there was no choice but to stop him in his tracks. I said that the heart attack was for his benefit, his body was about to give up completely and the heart attack, although for about 12 hours it was touch and go, was just an extreme warning. Basically, if he continued the same way he was on, the next attack would be his last.

Over the next few weeks he struggled with not working – his own highly successful business was entirely run by him, no delegation anywhere – although he was feeling physically more comfortable, he was a long way from full recovery. I remember asking him why he couldn’t/wouldn’t delegate and he found it impossible to answer. I suggested it was not so much a controlling element, but a belief that no-one could ‘run his baby’ (his words) as well or as successfully as him.

It took three and a half months before he finally accepted that his life had to completely change, and change it did. Over the next few months he sold his business and several properties he owned, plus most of his shares he had accrued over the years. With the money he bought a large house in Derbyshire and invested some money into a failing second-hand bookshop. His involvement with the shop was minimal, “Just enough to keep me interested,” he said.

The last time we met he admitted he now enjoyed his life more than he could have ever believed. He had plenty of money (multimillionaire) and was looking forward to living for the day. A heart person that lived a head life, now living a heart life. His health was no longer the issue it was, although he was taking regular long walks with his wife and dogs he was still considered to be ‘at risk’ – he’d be on medication for possibly the rest of his life. My last piece of advice was, “Always remember, if it feels right, then it must be right.” When he left my office that last day, he at last looked his age. When I first saw him he looked 60, when he left, he looked the 38 years he really was.

So here was someone who put incredible pressure on themselves, ignored all the warnings his body gave him (various aches and pains controlled with strong painkillers and a lot of alcohol) until something inside said, enough. Then he had his first heart attack, a warning, just a warning, but a warning he ignored. So he had a second heart attack which almost ended his life and yet he still ignored it, until I opened my mouth!

In his case, it was down to change through necessity. In the case of most people, changes have to be made slowly and carefully.

So this is the basis of the Quietmind Way, to follow your heart wherever it wants to lead you. However, it isn’t quite that simple.



Part Four - The Basics of the Quietmind Way (2)

To begin with, it is essential to look at everything from a personal point of view, not to ‘see’ through other peoples’ eyes. To do this it is important to follow several elements, all of which connect with each other and are simple to achieve.

The first element is to ‘FEEL’. For example, when out shopping do not look at an item of clothing and ask yourself, will I look good in this? Instead try it on, look in the mirror and go by what you immediately ‘feel’. If there is any doubt, do not buy it. Remember you are asking a lot of yourself, asking yourself to act in a way that has been alien to you, for possibly most of your life. This takes time to get used to, but the more you do it the more comfortable you begin to feel in yourself. This is the first stage, to begin to feel comfortable in and with yourself.

The second element is ‘TRUST’. Learn to trust what you feel, even if it is at odds with what you think. The instant reactive feelings we get when we are placed in certain situations are normally based upon the instinct to survive, however, after a time, as you learn to accept what you feel, your inner mind, your Quietmind, begins to be heard. Indeed some people actually hear a voice, not in their head or ears, but in their knowingness. The voice they hear is based on feeling and the more you hear and accept this voice the more natural, and powerful it becomes. When I say powerful, I don’t mean in volume or anything like that, it just becomes a ‘normal’ part of you and your daily life begins to flow more easily.

I’m moving a bit too fast. You must learn to trust what you feel without questioning it or analysing it. By questioning or analysing you are using your head and that is the bit that got you into trouble in the first place!
As you learn to ‘hear’ and trust, you will notice that you are calmer and more comfortable in everyday life. You begin to express yourself in ways you didn’t before. You become more positive in what you say, more confident too. This is because by listening to and trusting your inner voice, your instincts, you are removing doubt. Doubt lives in the head, never in the heart.

The third element is ‘ADVENTURE’.


Part Five - The Basics of the Quietmind Way (3)

Yes, ADVENTURE!

Adventure is about newness, about experiencing new things. The important factor is to welcome all newness, all possible adventure into your life. The foundations of the Quietmind Way need to spread as wide as possible and newness is a powerful driving force that can be both exciting and heart-warming. Life becomes more and more predictable as we grow older, it seems to lose something and that something is the spirit of adventure. If you reach a point in life where everything is predictable you must ask yourself why. Have you reached this place simply because you have been a passenger in your own life? If so, then maybe it’s time to move into the driving seat, turn the wheel and change direction, and drive towards adventure. No I’m not saying change your whole life, begin with one small aspect of it, just wait for the opportunity, take it and let it run.

The reason for ADVENTURE is to set the inner voice free, free to explore and find out, to discover new sensations and most of all, a new way of looking at life. See it like you have been wearing thick dark glasses all your life and suddenly you remove them and see clearly for the first time. Open your eyes and see what is really happening to you and within you. Set yourself free from the restrictions you have lived with; when opportunities arise and something inside says yes where normally your mouth would say no, listen to your inner need, for that is exactly what it is, a NEED.

So now you are able to FEEL from within, TRUST what you feel and move forward into your own personal ADVENTURE. These first three elements show you the beginnings of who you really are. You have started the journey, your mind is your own and you are becoming more and more alive. You see clearly that your life has been controlled by others, by circumstances, even by guilt and duty. Your eyes are open, use them and begin the ADVENTURE that is your life.

Now down to earth again.

We move on to the forth element, BELIEF. Everything so far is just wishful thinking, hope and excitement, but without BELIEF there can be no substance, no truth. BELIEF is about knowing that your inner voice will always steer you in the right direction. BELIEF is solid and is always from the heart.

You must be able to look into the mirror and see inside yourself, not with your eyes, but with your BELIEF. You must know what is there inside simply because it is you, entirely you. This is not an easy thing to do, especially if you have spent your life ‘fitting in’ or ‘trying to belong’.

Are you the type of person that is always looking for approval? Are you someone who feels happiest when in a group of people, one of many? Do you follow the trends and fashions of the day? Do you often say yes when you mean no and vice versa? If you answer yes to any or all of these questions, then you do not have enough self-belief. Your life is about who you try to be, it is dishonest because you are not being you.

I have a magic wand and I shall use it especially for you right now. I shall grant you one wish and it is this: You can choose to be anyone who has lived or is alive today, anyone. And with a wave of my magic wand you become that person for the rest of your life. (I’m now wand waving). The strange thing is, most if not all of you will answer in the same way, you say you just want to be you. So Hey Presto, your wish is my command – you are you. Magic indeed.

There are several billion people on this planet right now and every single one is unique, an individual. There is no-one exactly like you, no-one. This puts you at an advantage over everyone else in the world, it means you are the world’s expert at being you; no-one can be you better than you. So do not spend your life trying to be someone you are not – be true to yourself and live Your life Your way.

So you have now begun your journey, now you have to start getting used to being who you really are.


Part Six - The Basics of the Quietmind Way (4)

“So is that it, four elements to follow and my life will be perfect” – I’m sure you don’t believe that for one second. The Quietmind Way is about following your inner voice and using these four elements as a basis to work from. These are the foundational tools to help you to establish a way of life that you feel is right for you. We all, at times find ourselves doing things that we know we are unhappy about; I am not saying we shouldn’t do these things, what I am saying is that we must admit to ourselves that we are unhappy doing these things. The Quietmind Way isn’t about living some sort of escapism lifestyle, it’s all about honesty. These four elements are just a starter and to explain the whole process of the Quietmind Way in a few words is never going to be possible – I am currently writing the book, The Quietmind Way and once it is published it will be on sale here – yet in these few words you can get the feel of what is required. I suppose that the most important ingredient to enable you to live a life that is happy and fulfilling, you would need to understand what it is exactly that you want. I don’t mean things like a big house, loads of money, happy marriage etc. These are all projections of you; they are not about you, about the ‘you’ inside, they are about what you have done, what you have achieved. To be happy and fulfilled is about knowing that you are deeply happy within yourself, no matter what your financial status is and whether or not you are in a solid relationship – yes I admit, both these things can help, but they are but a part of you, they are not THE you.

The Quietmind Way is not a therapy, but a way of being, a way of life. It cannot ever be wrong as it always comes from within you and anything that comes from your depths is always true.

Reading this you might believe it only takes a short while to get it all together, but believe me this is not so. You might even begin to think that this Quietmind Way is a new and exciting revelation, again this is not so. The Quietmind Way is not based upon the normal academic processes that usually follow therapies; it is based upon the unsaid word, the unwritten word and most of all, the ‘unthought-of’ word (remember thought comes from the head).

We are born using our instincts and awareness. A baby will become upset if handed to someone who is feeling angry or aggressive, but place the child in the arms of someone who is calm and gentle, the baby ‘picks up’ the feeling and relaxes. Just because we ‘grow up’ it doesn’t mean we lose that ability, the ability to feel. The Quietmind Way gets back the connection with those inner feelings, the instincts, the knowingness, and uses this connection to grow and be more aware of our individual needs and desires.

From our early years we are taught to think, we are even taught how to think. Everything has to make sense, become logical and yet our personal lives are not governed by logic, but usually by emotion. The emotion within us all is unique; we are all emotional beings to one degree or another and use our inner feelings in our own way. The way emotion is generally used (and abused) is down to our personal experience of life as we have this far lived it, but it is also used by the more subtle manipulative tools, tools such as guilt. Strangely, most of this guilt is not ‘real’ personal guilt, but pseudo guilt, guilt created from what we have been taught or led to believe, guilt from the head, not from the heart. From early years we are governed and manipulated by various aspects of guilt. We are told not to do things that feel normal and natural, as society dictates we should not do them. How often have you questioned what you have been told, simply because deep inside you know different, you know and yet you have to ‘play by the rules’, which can create a huge feeling of frustration?

This inner knowingness is there inside us all, waiting to be heard, waiting to be able to ‘speak’ directly to us, in its own subtle way. This inner knowingness, this inner voice is our Quietmind. We all have a Quietmind, but few, it seems actually listen to it anywhere enough, some, sad to say, not at all.

So the Quietmind Way is about listening to your ‘inner voice’. The process begins by recognising the voice, then continues by letting it have a say in your life. A lot of people who suffer with depressive illnesses are people who have a strong inner voice, but through whatever reason, they do not listen to it, or perhaps I should say, they don’t actually hear it. The reason they don’t hear it is simple, they have been living a manufactured life for so long that they have forgotten that they are who they really are. They have lost their self-image, the person they really are. Their life has been dictated by role play, they have been nurtured to become a good wife, a good mother, a good husband, a good father etc. etc. So many problems can be solved by the discovery of the inner person and the connection with their inner voice. The Quietmind Way does just that, connects you with your inner reality, your inner truth; connects you with you.


Part Seven – The Quietmind Way


To explain how the Quietmind Way works is virtually impossible as each of us has a different character and consequently sees (and feels) the process in a unique way. However, there are a few common factors. To make it easy I shall list them:

1. As you begin to feel your decisions, life becomes easier.
2. Once you have made an instant decision, don’t put the thought in your head, accept it completely. Remember your head is the cause of most of your problems, not your heart.
3. When you are on the right pathway you will notice that coincidences begin to happen – coincidences are signs that all is well.
4. Once you begin to live the Quietmind Way, you find yourself more comfortable with people.
5. And as you begin to live the Quietmind Way, your health improves, both physically and emotionally.
6. Days pass by more quickly.
7. You laugh a lot more – you smile a lot more and become more decisive without having to think and worry about the result of your decisions.
8. You happily accept responsibility for yourself.
9. People will say that there is something different about you, but most of them wouldn’t be able to say how you were different.
10. You become happier with your life.

A big plus is that generally it is unnecessary to deal with past problems and conflicts. Trauma is not as common as we are led to believe. Different events leave different effects on each individual, so working directly to a set pattern, dealing with past problems, will never be the same for everyone. The Quietmind Way looks into the present; it strengthens the inner mind’s resolve for survival. It knows that by feeling good, old problems can be put on hold; it also knows that resurrecting old and especially buried problems doesn’t always make things better; often things get worse before they can improve. The Quietmind Way is the way of you; your own way is allowed to surface away from the past, away from the problems associated with your past. Allowing your inner voice to be heard and accepted is like saying to yourself, “I am happy being me.” As you move forward, usually into unchartered territory, there will be moments when the old you tries to creep back in, your head will fill with confusion and you begin to question the whole process – but remember, all you are doing is to listen to your own inner truth, your own uniqueness. The inner mind thrives on growth and the main objective of life surely, is growth. So as you grow and your inner voice becomes a normal part of your life, the whole ‘you’ grows, grows towards a greater and more wonderful and rewarding life. The proof is happiness, your happiness.

So ask yourself, are you a head person or a heart person? If you are a head person and are happy with how you are, then why would you be interested in the Quietmind Way – unless of course deep down inside you are really a heart person! However, if you accept that you are a heart person and have problems with your life, then maybe this is the answer you have been looking for, maybe your problems really can be sorted and your life made more stable and happy.

So there it is, it may sound like a panacea for all problems, but it isn’t. The Quietmind Way is about taking responsibility for your own true self, your own life, by simply following what you feel and who you are. It is about truth, your truth, the truth of who you are. It isn’t a therapy as it has no goal, it isn’t weird as it comes from within, it is simple and straightforward, and the best thing of all, it works.